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Aug. 14th, 2019 11:14 am Bought a house. Signed a bunch of papers to that effect at least.
Assumed my anxiety spike was just about carrying two mortgages and not having a job and the painting quote being high and not having a moving quote and not having enough packing done and and and.
Then I realized that wasn't quite it, or wasn't quite all of it. Different types of anxiety manifest differently and this is the tight around the lung feeling yelled at or yelled near. And no one's been yelling, but the corporate email list of conA is heating up a lot and it feels like yelling and I'm already anticipating yelling at the meeting next Thursday. So, there's that. And I intentionally ran for office, and I knew it would involve angry people, and I'm if not totally okay with it, I am totally capable of handling it.
But the small person who lives inside my ribcage inexorably racheting the tension up begs to differ.
Assumed my anxiety spike was just about carrying two mortgages and not having a job and the painting quote being high and not having a moving quote and not having enough packing done and and and.
Then I realized that wasn't quite it, or wasn't quite all of it. Different types of anxiety manifest differently and this is the tight around the lung feeling yelled at or yelled near. And no one's been yelling, but the corporate email list of conA is heating up a lot and it feels like yelling and I'm already anticipating yelling at the meeting next Thursday. So, there's that. And I intentionally ran for office, and I knew it would involve angry people, and I'm if not totally okay with it, I am totally capable of handling it.
But the small person who lives inside my ribcage inexorably racheting the tension up begs to differ.
