(no subject)

I am so very suspicious of my own temper tantrums, one of which I am totally having right now.  I'm suspicious of cutting myself any slack, feeling as if I cancel this gym appointment before I figure out whether or not this is a migraine means that I'm a failure on some grand scale.  And I probably need to get rid of the failure narrative altogether some day, but for the moment I think I'll just sit with the fact that even if this Monday is a failure, there will be other Mondays.

It feels like most of everyone is elsewhere, and tomorrow we're driving away to be elsewhere ourselves for a week.   And I'm trying to figure out what decision I made in the past that is making me lonely right now, so I can do this better next time, but it is totally not working.  Maybe it's time to take the jingly toy away from the kitten, set an alarm in case I fall asleep and watch some mindless hulu.