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May. 22nd, 2004 04:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
omnia_mutanturnewsy post out of boredom. light's having the most cryptic conversation, having been awoken from his nap, but he sounds a lot better than when i convinced him to nap.
we're packing, which is weird, but also oddly familiar. not in terms of his packing, he didn't let me in on much of the last go round, just in terms of moving and motion and maybe i am getting a little excited about the idea of getting to move again, starting over somewhere new.
i bought supersecret crush a handful of postcards and want to post them all Right Now, with my favorite cryptic quotes on them. i even got one with annie sprinkle.
i ended up sobbing hysterically on my way here, keeping it together enough to keep driving and then losing pretty much everything when i actually got here. for those of you not prone to hysteria, crying yourself sick is not just for babies and small children. 28yo women in the midst of serious lifechanges and incredibly bad weeks can also do it.
i don't know if i'm better now. i don't really think i am, actually, there's just too much other stuff to do, and i'll tamp it back down and hopefully not slip enough to let it out. i'm not sure what cracked under the pressure, or what precipitated the crack, it might be the simple exhaustion of not sleeping a night through for a whole week, though i've done that before. it might be trying to find something to wear to Atlantic's graduation that won't prompt any cracks about my weight. (this is the first time i'm seeing my family alone since the visit in january with light post christmas-debacle.) or it might just be the aforementioned gigantic lifechange, which really, i'm either communicating badly or everyone else in the world is underplaying what kind of change it is for me.
i feel like throwing a tempertantrum in the middle of a supermarket aisle and screaming i'm scared until kindly middleaged ladies soothe me and bring me to the information desk. in an entirely metaphorical way, of course. though i'm not sure what it would be a metaphor for.
but now it's time for more packing. gaily onward and all.
we're packing, which is weird, but also oddly familiar. not in terms of his packing, he didn't let me in on much of the last go round, just in terms of moving and motion and maybe i am getting a little excited about the idea of getting to move again, starting over somewhere new.
i bought supersecret crush a handful of postcards and want to post them all Right Now, with my favorite cryptic quotes on them. i even got one with annie sprinkle.
i ended up sobbing hysterically on my way here, keeping it together enough to keep driving and then losing pretty much everything when i actually got here. for those of you not prone to hysteria, crying yourself sick is not just for babies and small children. 28yo women in the midst of serious lifechanges and incredibly bad weeks can also do it.
i don't know if i'm better now. i don't really think i am, actually, there's just too much other stuff to do, and i'll tamp it back down and hopefully not slip enough to let it out. i'm not sure what cracked under the pressure, or what precipitated the crack, it might be the simple exhaustion of not sleeping a night through for a whole week, though i've done that before. it might be trying to find something to wear to Atlantic's graduation that won't prompt any cracks about my weight. (this is the first time i'm seeing my family alone since the visit in january with light post christmas-debacle.) or it might just be the aforementioned gigantic lifechange, which really, i'm either communicating badly or everyone else in the world is underplaying what kind of change it is for me.
i feel like throwing a tempertantrum in the middle of a supermarket aisle and screaming i'm scared until kindly middleaged ladies soothe me and bring me to the information desk. in an entirely metaphorical way, of course. though i'm not sure what it would be a metaphor for.
but now it's time for more packing. gaily onward and all.
