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day three, bruised.
Today, I experienced the fun of an unsuccessful blood draw. So I've bruises on the insides of my elbows, and an appointment to go back on Friday.
It's a blank kind of day. I've been cleaning for most of the day, watching Brooklyn 99 with a sickly Light, trying to imagine what a Quint Buchholz tarot deck would look like and generally trying to steer myself away from thinking about much of anything. I could be working, or cleaning even more, but for the moment I'm staring blankly at this text, trying to find something of interest to say.
I want to crack myself open and feel clean again. I want to feel like I'm busy in good and interesting ways, rather than this endless game of catchup. I want to have better hobbies, take better care of myself, cry less and walk more. I want to feel interesting and worthwhile and even more outrageously, I want to find myself interesting and worthwhile.
Work in progress, I guess.
Today, I experienced the fun of an unsuccessful blood draw. So I've bruises on the insides of my elbows, and an appointment to go back on Friday.
It's a blank kind of day. I've been cleaning for most of the day, watching Brooklyn 99 with a sickly Light, trying to imagine what a Quint Buchholz tarot deck would look like and generally trying to steer myself away from thinking about much of anything. I could be working, or cleaning even more, but for the moment I'm staring blankly at this text, trying to find something of interest to say.
I want to crack myself open and feel clean again. I want to feel like I'm busy in good and interesting ways, rather than this endless game of catchup. I want to have better hobbies, take better care of myself, cry less and walk more. I want to feel interesting and worthwhile and even more outrageously, I want to find myself interesting and worthwhile.
Work in progress, I guess.
