(no subject)

I didn't do everything I planned today.  This is the refrain of my fridays, I suspect.

 

First thing I felt down a hole in the internet.  Looking up someone to get some context about something with conA, discovered they were a graduate of my alma mater and we had "friends" in common on Inadequacybook.  not that they're bad people or anything, just also haven't talked to them in 20 years.  But I still have all the feels about being a failure and thinking about how I spent four years in the late nineties and everything that came after or didn't come after still feels like a bone bruise that can't heal.   So, lost an hour there, late getting to gym, therapy did that 0-60 thing where I'm bitching about moving at one point and then I'm sobbing hysterically about not wanting to be myself.  Home, some cleaning, drafting an awful email, a lot of email cleanup (I'm realizing quickly that my increased involvement is going to involve stay a lot more on top of my email, and not having a job sitting at a computer for most of the day  most of the days is going to mean I need to have dedicated email time, and maybe that just needs to be friday afternoons.

 

Light came home from a doctor's office, we ordered indian, watched some black mirror, left to go get boxes from the hardware store, whilst we were gone, Nonsense managed to snag half of our dinner off the counter and consumed the entirety of a garlic naan and a peshwary naan.  She seems unharmed, if also completely uninterested in her usual dinner.

 

Tomorrow, I volunteer.  Hopefully while doing that, I figure out what to make or buy for the potluck so on the way home I can buy it or ingredients to make it.  If we have enough stamina in the evening and have gotten a little more packing done, then maybe we can even have a B&N date.  

 

I have all these half-formed thoughts, about the latest poly speed dating invite, about crushes, about being wanted and about wanting.  But mostly I probably should concentrate on putting books in boxes and writing uncomfortable but important emails.   Right now, however, I'm going to concentrate on falling unconscious.