Difficult days, elegant years

 Got to spend a couple hours with babybaby (i've been calling her this primarily to avoid calling her babygirl). And though I'm still glad to come home to my house, it never feels long enough. Nannying for a non-cohabitating partner is odd.

 

I keep looking for reasonable sounding journal prompts, things to write about, things I want to write down for whatever reasons. I'm drowning under to-do lists that I forget how to even use, I know I'm not actually better, I'm just less sick and if I do to much right now, I'll get more sick, but the dog peed in her bed and there are so many dishes and I feel all helpless and inhabiting-a-gender-roley about the stove when I want to feel badass.  And I fall back on this, Light has the sweet salary, Light deals with the snowblower.  Sure, I deal with almost everything else, but 

 

I make lists of events I want to attend, knowing full well that I'm almost never enough to motivate myself out the door solo, not wanting to bother people into attending things with me, feeling like everyone has a real job and so I should let them veg.  And only one of the three of us is really drawing an income, so I have these minicrises about whether or not I should actually spend money on tickets.   (case in point, still tickets available for Magic Dyke, the drag king burlesque based on Magic Mike) (case in point, Kelly Link was at Brookline Booksmith tonight).

 

I went to the doctor's again this afternoon, she told me it didn't look at all like an ear infection, that it's possibly an infection of the lymph node itself, possibly something to do with TMJ or the like.   So now instead of the wretched drops, I'm on augmentin.  

  

I have a journaling pinterest where I pin anything that talks about journal prompts. 90% of the time there's nothing to the lists, but today's link took the cake.  "50 lists to make when life feels overwhelming" Number 1 - list all the books you'd like to read.  

 

There was once a comedian who made a joke about how BH&G told her that two egg whites could be subsituted for an egg in a pinch, the punch line of which was "BH&G, I don't think you understand my problem"  (I'm very bad at remembering and telling jokes, believe me it's uproarious when well-delivered and is about the absurdity of recommending two eggs as a solution for no eggs.)

 

List of lists, I don't think you understand my problem.