(no subject)

Weirdly enough, not having handled fish today, I'm convince my hands smell like seafood. I've washed my hands with every flavor of hand soap in the house, and since the smell is completely unchanged, I'm pretty sure it's entirely in my head. Awesome.

Light and I binged at Target today, and bought a bookcase and a tv for his room, in hopes that it will convince us to use the treadmill more often. He's setting it up now, while I lounge about and watch the latest episode of Glee on hulu. It's a good life.

Visiting the animal shelter with Chile today, fell in love with half a dozen kittens and as many dogs. I freak out sometimes, and think that I certainly can't have a dog if I can't manage to keep my house clean, my laundry and my dishes done. I'm afraid my cats will never forgive me, and that it'll keep me from actually pulling off going to school. But I also think I really, really want one, and that if I can have one, I really should. I have enough trouble committing to a coffee table, though, how am I ever going to find a dog? Though, truthfully, all of the cats in the house found me, one way or another. Kraken is yelling, Funnyface is trying to sit on my head, and Princess and Noisy are swarming, because it's dinnertime.

There's some relationshippy stuff going on, Light and I have some things to work out, and I get anxious about how we're going to resolve them, but I don't doubt we will. I'm afraid that we're switching roles, he's trying to give up something, and now I'm the one on my laptop too much, or not paying enough attention to him because I'm unhappy at work.

And it's scary to have work become a means to an end, rather than the end itself. for a little while I thought this was it. I'd found a thing I was good at, an atmosphere that was pretty awesome, and a mission I believed in. And maybe that'll come back, but right now the office is too small and thinking about it gives me a sort of sinking sensation. And I'm afraid that if I'm unhappy here it's because I'm a person who is unhappy at work, rather than the hospital being a bad place for me.

Speaking of which, I ran into an old coworker in Mr Crepe right before the EFO show, and I gave her my card. She didn't have any of hers on her (or so she said) but she assured me she'd email me, and now I'm a little sad that she hasn't.

I think I might go to the Audrey Ryan/Rachel Efron show by myself on Tuesday. I kind of want to be home, and hanging out with Light while he prepares his magical stuffing, but I kind of also want to go to the show and I haven't really figured out while desire is stronger. Well, the clingy one is the stronger one, but I don't know if it's the one I'm going to listen to.

I'm getting very, very excited for Thanksgiving.

(no subject)

Weirdly enough, not having handled fish today, I'm convince my hands smell like seafood. I've washed my hands with every flavor of hand soap in the house, and since the smell is completely unchanged, I'm pretty sure it's entirely in my head. Awesome.

Light and I binged at Target today, and bought a bookcase and a tv for his room, in hopes that it will convince us to use the treadmill more often. He's setting it up now, while I lounge about and watch the latest episode of Glee on hulu. It's a good life.

Visiting the animal shelter with Chile today, fell in love with half a dozen kittens and as many dogs. I freak out sometimes, and think that I certainly can't have a dog if I can't manage to keep my house clean, my laundry and my dishes done. I'm afraid my cats will never forgive me, and that it'll keep me from actually pulling off going to school. But I also think I really, really want one, and that if I can have one, I really should. I have enough trouble committing to a coffee table, though, how am I ever going to find a dog? Though, truthfully, all of the cats in the house found me, one way or another. Kraken is yelling, Funnyface is trying to sit on my head, and Princess and Noisy are swarming, because it's dinnertime.

There's some relationshippy stuff going on, Light and I have some things to work out, and I get anxious about how we're going to resolve them, but I don't doubt we will. I'm afraid that we're switching roles, he's trying to give up something, and now I'm the one on my laptop too much, or not paying enough attention to him because I'm unhappy at work.

And it's scary to have work become a means to an end, rather than the end itself. for a little while I thought this was it. I'd found a thing I was good at, an atmosphere that was pretty awesome, and a mission I believed in. And maybe that'll come back, but right now the office is too small and thinking about it gives me a sort of sinking sensation. And I'm afraid that if I'm unhappy here it's because I'm a person who is unhappy at work, rather than the hospital being a bad place for me.

Speaking of which, I ran into an old coworker in Mr Crepe right before the EFO show, and I gave her my card. She didn't have any of hers on her (or so she said) but she assured me she'd email me, and now I'm a little sad that she hasn't.

I think I might go to the Audrey Ryan/Rachel Efron show by myself on Tuesday. I kind of want to be home, and hanging out with Light while he prepares his magical stuffing, but I kind of also want to go to the show and I haven't really figured out while desire is stronger. Well, the clingy one is the stronger one, but I don't know if it's the one I'm going to listen to.

I'm getting very, very excited for Thanksgiving.