Oh, chronic depression. You are so much fun.

I totally expected this. I am completely aware of all of the sources of my current mood. I accepted that this was the consequence of a handful of different decisions, and embraced it.

So why does it have to suck quite so much to be rolling around in the depths of it? If I chose it, I should be fine with it, right?

I always thought the whole ipod randomly meaningful playlist thing was a hyperbole, something with a grain of truth, but with subtle exaggeration to make it a better story. However, I'm 90% sure iTunes is trying to convince me to stick my head in my (admittedly electric) oven. And yes, a hefty amount of my music leans towards the depressing, but a day chock full of Cowboy Junkies, Magnetic Fields, and all the wallowingest Ani Difranco songs? That seems a bit much.

I can't motivate myself to do anything. I cleaned like crazy for about three hours this morning and have spent the rest of the day curled up on the couch, drinking lukewarm tea and trying to read some young adult fantasy or trying to come up with something productive to do with my time. I groomed Funnyface to the point where she should be bald, and now am settled in with the last disc of season two of Veronica Mars, mostly to keep myself from obsessing over minor imperfections in the house.

I'm going to go try to read The Golem's Eye again, until it's time to go make dinner. This should be the life. When will I stop feeling like such an ungrateful bitch for not reveling in it?

Oh, chronic depression. You are so much fun.

I totally expected this. I am completely aware of all of the sources of my current mood. I accepted that this was the consequence of a handful of different decisions, and embraced it.

So why does it have to suck quite so much to be rolling around in the depths of it? If I chose it, I should be fine with it, right?

I always thought the whole ipod randomly meaningful playlist thing was a hyperbole, something with a grain of truth, but with subtle exaggeration to make it a better story. However, I'm 90% sure iTunes is trying to convince me to stick my head in my (admittedly electric) oven. And yes, a hefty amount of my music leans towards the depressing, but a day chock full of Cowboy Junkies, Magnetic Fields, and all the wallowingest Ani Difranco songs? That seems a bit much.

I can't motivate myself to do anything. I cleaned like crazy for about three hours this morning and have spent the rest of the day curled up on the couch, drinking lukewarm tea and trying to read some young adult fantasy or trying to come up with something productive to do with my time. I groomed Funnyface to the point where she should be bald, and now am settled in with the last disc of season two of Veronica Mars, mostly to keep myself from obsessing over minor imperfections in the house.

I'm going to go try to read The Golem's Eye again, until it's time to go make dinner. This should be the life. When will I stop feeling like such an ungrateful bitch for not reveling in it?