(no subject)

just read a livejournal post that has me nauseated with some combination of fury and tears. i don't want things to end this way, or even go this way, but i stand by most of what has lead to where i am. i can see how everyone else reads it as something else, and if that's how i go down in the history books, if i'm the next to play villain, i'm not sure i have tools to fight against something i've accepted in so many other circumstances.

but i still want to throw up. and i still don't know what do to, or if it's all already been taken out of my hands.

(no subject)

just read a livejournal post that has me nauseated with some combination of fury and tears. i don't want things to end this way, or even go this way, but i stand by most of what has lead to where i am. i can see how everyone else reads it as something else, and if that's how i go down in the history books, if i'm the next to play villain, i'm not sure i have tools to fight against something i've accepted in so many other circumstances.

but i still want to throw up. and i still don't know what do to, or if it's all already been taken out of my hands.